chica chica ummm bomp bomp chica chica
Made my day!
I couldn't put stuff like The Identical or Saving Christmas on my list just because they're so hilarious and batshit crazy. If I enjoy watching a movie, I don't really care if it's "objectively good" or not.
Jake has some glorious locks.
He's preparing for his role as the Dastardly Lion in the upcoming "Wizard of Snobs".
I can't stop looking at Jake's glorious mane of hair. It's so fucking poofy
I don't know if I could make a proper worst movies list, but I'll try:
1 - Devil's Due
2 - As Above, So Below
3 - Legends of Oz: Dorothy's Return
4 - The Identical
5 - Annabelle
Legends Of Oz: Dorothy's return was indeed an awful film. I have it at #2 on my list
Wau! I was expecting completely as number 1 yours Rampage: Capital Punishment Brad, especially seeing how offended you were there.
Oh Hells Yeah! I'd watch any of those other worst list choices over a dozen times - with wired eyelids- before I'd even touch THAT fucking film. It is one of the most asinine things I've ever seen.... even when including all these Jeebus movies (and that's coming from an
It deserves to be buried up Kirk Cameron's Croco-duck ASS.
Boatie and the Beast
No, see the point of the joke is it's all Burt Reynolds movies, like Smokey and the Boatdit.
The Man Who Loved Boats'
Boaty's Machine, Boater, Navajo Boat, and, of course, Deliverance.
The Men Who Stare at Boats
It doesn't take much to get Dave to want to beat you. Just tell him you like Man of Steel.
Oh how I love Jake's interactions with Mr. Sun.
You should have ended this by zooming out, and there's 12 other people in the room and you're in a board meeting.
I love how as soon as Brad said "I'm your wizard", Jake started doing his James Franco face. It's like a Pavlovian trigger.
No Rampage: Capital Punishment? You were really pissed at that one.
I stayed away from DTV movies.
Kirk Cameron Saves Christmas, I called it. This was a special kind of bad.
Caviar taste exactly like what it is, cold salty fish eggs.
Yeah, I thought it would either be that, God's Not Dead, or Endless Love.
How does one become the master of sandwich?
I dunno Greg..... but I'd stay away from his mayo....
Brad, if you don't have an April Fool's video planned, The Adventures of Jake and Mr. Sun might be fun.
Man, I'm not sure anybody can top Brad's list. God damn he saw some shit this year. Then again, I thought Jake would have the worst movies before this video, so maybe one of the other's can convince me they had a worse year.
Ooh, Jake was getting into Cinema Snob Movie territory at the end there when coming up with ideas for new movies to make! "Card Sharks" can be put on hold, I want that genuine movie to be made!
And I really need to not be drawing while Mr. Sun talks, because I almost smeared process red Prismacolor on my paper while laughing. I almost feel bad for Jake having to endure all that golden goodness, but well, Mr. Sun just makes me feel too good to feel bad for long. He's magical that way.
Jake has such a luxurious mane of hair.
Hey Brad, you mentioned that you're not an atheist. May I ask what religion (or lack of) you do follow?
I've heard a rogue rumor that he's Catholic, but that might be completely fake.
He's said he went to Catholic school, but not because he or his folks were religious. He's said several times in the religious movie reviews that he prefers to call himself agnostic.
My guess is that he's agnostic.
Dave for Baby Jesus
,Slaver Brian Santa/Krampus
Gillian the Grinch
I guarantee you Zombeavers is worse than anything on this list. Zombeavers is the worst comedy/horror movie I've seen in ages.
Is it about zombie beavers?
Pretty brutal list. Fortunately I haven't seen as many bad movies, but my five worst would have to be:
5. Left Behind
4. No Good Deed
3. V/H/S: Viral
2. The Expendables 3
I'd absolutely watch a Team Snob religious movie! Starring Dave and Brian, and if Jake starts growing out his beard with his hair he could play Jesus!
I usually pick a top 5 list of worst movies because I don't see too many movies I considered bad especially when I had to see a movie almost every Friday. At least I can take comfort knowing that my 5 picks range from mediocre to just freakin' awful!
But when I had to choose my #5 movie, it was a three-way battle between the title I chose, The Hundred-Foot Journey, and Transformers: Age of Extinction. These were the movies that certainly had some positive things going for, but I then eventually chose the one that had the most potential, but falls very short of greatness.
So here's my top 5 worst list:
5. The Monuments Men
3. Exodus: Gods and Kings
2. Need for Speed
1. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
I can tell you one thing, if there is such a thing as the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse then it came in the form of four talking, farting turtles!
After watching your Vlog on Endless Love I thought it was going to be Top 3 at least. I think you were more pissed off at that than you were Transformers 3.
You have to read the next bit of blannie hate male once you receive it.
Yeah several paragraphs of crazy is what I saw, and I couldn't even bother to finish reading it. Jake doesn't like Blannie, and this guy writes a novel about what he perceives as Jake's deeply rooted faults.
YOU ARE WRONG SIR!
Given the fact that Saving Christmas has the highest dollar per team snob revenue, it obviously should be on your best of list. I am a manager of a christian owned family sports diner, so I know what I'm talking about. We have 3 Vizio 47" televisions. One is always on Natgeo for some fucking reason. But, we celebrate sports the same way we celebrate CHRIST!
Shit. I should have finished listening to the review before inserting snarky comments.
Also, totally serious about managing a christian owned diner... by a strip club...next to a closed down crack den.
We have gospel karaoke on tuesdays...
Is jake auditioning to be spoonys stunt double?
Ok, no joke, I actually went to go watch the Richard Pryor is scared for no reason sketch when you brought it up, and the #1 recommended video in the corner was a 2 hour compilation of Jake.
Also, no joke, after seeing God's Not Dead, I went ahead and wrote a screenplay that is a sane version of that movie, where a christian and an atheist debate each other about creationism and evolution, where the christian kid over the movie starts to realize he's being kind of an elitist dick, and at the end of the movie they become friends. If you are serious about making a religious movie, I will sell you my screenplay.
Gotta ask, is the Christmas gift for Jake a reference to Notorious? Because if it is then you get ultra props from me, Brad.
I'm so glad someone else hates the BULLSHIT evangelical christian movies. It is lonely here in Tennessee.
PS. caviar isn't very good. I have been to Russia and tried the "supposedly" great caviar both the red and the black. I hated it.
Fuckin Finally, some people who understand at least a Bit of how psychiatric treatment works. Some shit, can't be talked away, not with squishy feelings, or with pleas to some alleged deity, some shit is derived from a chemical imbalance that brings about a skewed perception of reality which has an adverse affect on outward behavior.
speaking of which, once I'm able to finalize some relocation necessities, I'll be researching how certain, easy to cultivate, plants can be used to treat schizophrenia and other such chemically based "debilitating" psychiatric conditions, pro-bono of course.
Looking at the facts as they stand, I can only conclude that most psychiatric treatment boils down to clusters of blanket treatments for blanket symptoms, a lot of which use unhealthy binding agents, and all have negative physiological long term effects.
My method, though admittedly slow to get to the point of maximum efficiency, is still, even in preliminary stages, Much more efficient as a treatment, on average Much more preferable, zero long term physiological damage (or at least none I've been able to conclude),
specifically tailored to the individual patient, and can be the treatment can be sustained by the patient at little-to no cost to the patient, and none of the funds for that process go to me, they'd go to gardening shops, or whatever, I don't care where they get their botanical supplies, so long as they're not using shit that'll harm'em.
Anyway, just a big fan, and thought you might be interested in some of the stuff some of your fans are involved in.
I like to think that, though there Is a kind of separation between content creator and viewer, we still share a common social network, that being the internet in general. I enjoy how we've been able to inspire each other, and entertain each other, through this communication tool, and I'd like for that cycle to continue, through further communication.
Keep up the outstanding work, we'll continue to appreciate it, because it's worth appreciating.
also, I almost forgot, will there ever be more 80's Dan, or is that show dead? I'm not sure why, but that style of comedy hits home with me, very amusing indeed.
This is a question for Dave mostly, but who wins for worst director between these two based on 2014 vs. 2013.
Tyler Perry or The Lord.
The Lord MADE Tyler Perry, so I vote Him to win that contest.
Brad tries Caviar. Needs to happen.
From what you guys said about teh movie kirk cameron saving christmas i wonder if he has been trolling us and he is a double agent. Secretly trying to destroy the brain dead christian logic(not all christians just the crazy ones) And and the movie was like a wink at that....oooor he is really fucking crazy either way someone should make a movie or documentary of people trying to figure out that horseshit
It's a tempting theory, but looking at his biography and seeing him interviewed, I think he's just not that bright and can't see the flaws in his bat shit Christmas movie. It's as if he saw Supply Side Jesus and didn't see the joke.
dear brad, jack sucks.
kind regards, your alter ego
I'll let Jack know.
Is Jack the one you sent to watch movies with Jullian?
10) Boyhood. like watching the condensed lowlights of a soap opera.
9)VHS Viral. pisses on the passible legacy of VHS
8)The Amazing Spiderman 2, the even more underwhelming Spiderman 3.
7)Need for Speed. wretched
6)Left Behind, Nic Cage sleepwalking
5)The Judge, Robert Downey Jnr reminding people what a melodramatic ham he can be when required to emote.
4)Horrible Bosses 2, painfully unfunny
3)God's not Dead, nasty but sort of fascinating
2)The Identical, a classic bad movie
1)Saving Christmas, bat shit crazy.
"10) Boyhood. like watching the condensed lowlights of a soap opera."
THANK YOU! I finally found someone else who put this on their worst list (I had it at #7 on mine)
The only others on your list that I saw were "TASM2" - saved from my list by some OK action scenes and I actually liked the chemistry between Garfield and Stone - and "The Judge" - a made-for-TV-movie with better than normal actors.
Normally, I would not go out of my way to see movies that I know will be bad, but last year Brad reviewed so many Christian films I was intrigued and yup. they were genuinely awful. TASM2 it was a case of liking the first one and thinking the sequel had a lot of the faults of Raimi's Spiderman 3. Most of the films I saw last year I liked. Boyhood was hyped to death and I just thought you could take any long running TV drama edit it down to two and half hours and achieve pretty much the same effect. It wasn't that well acted and none of the characters really felt like they were part of an actual family, I don't care how much praise it gets. I thought it was plain bad. I did toy with putting Lucy on the list because of all the stock animal footage, but I was entertained. I was also very tempted to put A New York's Winters Tale . However it's actually well made and odd enough to gain some sort of long term cult as a Christmas film.
Boyhood was amazing in my opinion. I thought it was the best film of 2014
Mister Sun may be the best thing to come out of Kirk Camron, Brad Tries, and Team Snob in general.
That Jake sure is a juicy piece of man-flesh.
I want so desperately to see Saving Christmas, but it was gone from Theaters before I could see it. And there seems to be no trace of it on the internet or word of a DVD. Will I forever be unable to see this cinematic holocaust?
Spider-Man 2? Dennis Leary? You mean Willem Defoe, or am I missing something?
They meant "The Amazing Spider-Man 2"
Personally, the worst films I saw this year were "Transcendence" and "Winter's Tale". "Transcendence" is a textbook example on how to ruin your speculative fiction by destroy a side of your argument with terrorist straw men.
"Winter's Tale" is the first film I've seen where characters seem to operate on different levels than each other. What the fuck even happens in this film?! It's like the characters are barely talking to each other; it's like even THEY don't understand what the others are talking about.
I seriously thought Rampage: Capital Punishment was going to be your number one. In the case of God's Not Dead and Saving Christmas, bashing anyone who isn't Christian is definitely offensive, but doesn't glorifying domestic terrorism, as you put it, seem much more offensive?
I saw enough bad movies this year to leave off DTV entries.
Wow, the worst film on those list that I've actually seen was "Annie" -- that was awful, but I still hated, "A Million Ways To Die in the West", "Transcendence", and "Sex Tape" more than that.
However, the WORST film I actually saw was one I don't think anyone on this site saw -- "The Captive" starring Ryan Reynolds and directed by Atom Egoyan. Was a piece of dreck -- honestly, Reynolds was the only thing that kept it somewhat coherent.
If for some reason someone wants to watch my 12 worst films of the year (of 79 at the time, now up to 82), here's my video:
Mr. Brad Jones. You missed out on seeing Dinesh D'souza's America, and live in a far happier world than I do for having done so.
Also Mr. Sun is amazing.
This video needs more tits and nazi imagery
So..."God Is Not Dead" is the Christian version of Kevin Smith's "Red State"?
Not at all. "Red State" had at least some religious characters in it who were not only NOT psychopaths, but also pointed out how what the villains were doing in the movie were both wrong and most certainly not Christian. And I say that as someone who really doesn't like Red State, but it's not for that reason.
So first there's Jetsetters, now we have Brad Jones' Saving Christmas. Shot on Shitteo needs to come out so we can get to work on them!
Jetsetter needs to be a thing,seriously.Jake,you need to spam all the animation studios with a script.Considering the schlock they made these last years,at least one is bound to agree to animate jetsetter.
Y'know, this is actually the first time I decided to sit through one of these vlogs,I just rarely felt interested enough to spend a full hour of free time, and by god am I glad I did. I'll have to go back and watch some of these midnight screening videos, if you guys are just as funny there. I about died a few times in this one, the Winters Tale bit especially xD
I don't see so many movies in a year, and really the only bad ones I'd call out for me would be Annabelle and As Above So Below. I mostly saw fairly solid films, even if I'm a bit undecided on whether or not I liked Interstellar; it was all beautifully made and I at least didn't get bored and thought it had a lot of really neat ideas but at the same time it didn't engage me enough to fully care about what was going on.
So how long till the gang gets together to watch Tyler Perry's Madea's Tough Love....now at Redbox...
Always one of the best videos of the year :D
I wanna marry Jake's hair now... Reminds me of Wolf from the Tenth Kingdom.
Brad you should do radio
Kind of felt that Saving Christmas should have not been eligible for the list. I'm not saying it is a movie that the Snob shouldn't hate and it should be treated it like the crap it is. But, after watching 3 Midnight Screenings, I didn't think there was much more anyone could say about that train wreck of a movie.
Throughout this hour, I was prompted to google, among other things, "Legends of Oz Noble Mouse King", "Think Like a Man Too", and "Richard Pryor Scared for No Reason". Pretty successful hour if you ask me!
Nice list. Here is my list as usual.
1. Leprechaun Origins
2. Haunted House 2
3. Devil's Due
4. Left Behind
5. I Frankenstein
6. VHS Viral
7. See No Evil 2
10. The Quiet Ones
Dishonorable mentions: Son Of God, Lucy, No Good Deed
Top 10 worst movies of 2014:
1. Ride Along
2. Legends Of Oz: Dorothy’s Return
3. God’s Not Dead
5. The Pyramid
6. Let’s Be Cops
7. If I Stay
9. Into The Storm
10. The Rover
I'm waiting for your new series "The Adventures of Jake and Mr. Sun."
The wacky antics of a young, cynical suburbanite, and a coffee-peddling solar deity!
Brad, you guys really did miss a film that may be on par with Saving Christmas in how godawful painful it was. You missed Atlas Shrugged Part III. Dunno if you knew it actually happened, but... wow. I mean wow. Seriously if you wind up seeing this, you'll wanna revise this list. It's like paying to watch a Lifetime movie. Pure pain.
Jake and Mr. Sun needs to be a series I swear to god.
I think what Jake is nice warm dark brew to take his mind off not having a nice warm brew.
*I think what Jake needs is a nice warm dark brew to take his mind off not having a nice warm brew.
Sorry you must forgive me, I'm weak without my coffee.
I hope you get the top ten videos up at some point. They were always one of my favorites. Good way to look back at all the shitty movies of that year and revel in their badness.
it's still there.
It is a great article. You will surely like this also because it is a great stuff