But does he save Christmas?
I TRULY wish you'd do a review for Hell of the Living Dead and Erotic Nights of the Living Day like the good fun days, these are ok too.
I ABSOLUTELY LOVED THIS! I guess I was just in the mood for some Turkish flavored laughs! Who needs dialogue anyway when you can steal a glorious Jerry Goldsmith score?
Also, the Ed Glaser bit is kind of like Ed Rooney repeatedly hitting the intercom on Ferris Bueller's front door. Nice running gag. I liked it!
Woot new episode!
The main character looks like more of a Turkish Dirty Harry then Rambo.
The same actor made a couple of sleuth flicks in the late 80's. Also that movie is known for it's absurdity and ambiguousness in Turkey.
They drey first blood? Is drey even a word?
Yes. It's the word for a Squirrel's nest.
I was hoping for some bloopers at the end where Ed screwed up his lines
The villain looks like James Lipton, not Vincent Price :P
Turkish Hans Gruber
Nice review Brad, always love your Turkish movie reviews. Anyway I've noticed in every Turkish movie you reviewed there is always hot Turkish women.Just though i'd make that observation.
That's because you almost never see them under the Burkha's they wear. To quote Generation Kill, 'I never knew Haji's could be hotties!'
I once met a guy from Jordan. He was with a friend of a friend, and clearly looking to get lucky. He chatted a bit - I asked how he liked NZ, and his response was "you have really hot girls." I was a bit taken aback by his directness, and was like "I'm sure you must have plenty of hot girls back home too." The look he gave me...
I dunno, maybe it's a fetishisation of western culture and our percieved "loose" women but it weirded me out.
In case you wonder why Kalkavan Video has an address in Germany - looks like they distributed turkish films for immigrants in the 80ies.
Man I really enjoy these Turkish reviews. They just seem so odd in such delightful and sometimes awesome ways. I'm guessing with all of those hints Turkish Star Wars II will be the Thanksgiving video for next year. Hell I wouldn't complain if he did a whole month of Star Wars knock-offs in the lead up to the new movie.
This was very enjoyable.
Oh thank God, a new Snob episode!
NOW I can expect some comedy.
Hello; I'm Ed Glaser.
Brad, you seriously need to subtitle a whole Turkish film and then release it on your site. Call it the "Snob's cut".
Amazing how Rambo can get his justice, but not the dead children of Ferguson. Unbelievable.
Well, that escalated quickly
So, this video-company has a adress in Neuss? Neuss, as in Neuss, the town in Germany? So it is a turkish ripoff but... not from turkey.
It's possible that they imported it into Germany from Turkey.
is it me, or does the guy with no arms looks like John Rhys-Davies? also, one of the blue suited guys at the end looks suspiciously like either David Tomlinson or a younger John Cleese.
"He drank some water which was actually a bomb."
I hate it when that happens.
So this is why I can't take my bottle of water on an airplane...
Honestly, this movie looks pretty fun!
Like always, great review Brad. I was lucky enough to see this movie with proper english subtitles on VHS. And as far as Turkish ripoffs go, this movie sticks pretty close to the source material. And it's my favourite turkish mockbuster movie of that era. Beating even Turkish Star Wars.
Don't know if anyone has seen Turkish Rambo (aka Rampage) or at least Doug's review of it... but I'm pretty sure that the villain in that is the exact same guy as the villain here
... I even IMDBed it; not only is Hüseyin Peyda in both, but so is Osman Betin.
(If Ed Glazar could say more than 2 sentences, I'm sure he would've pointed it out.)
So are they meant to be in the same series? Do they have it in their contracts to appear in all future Rambo projects? Or are there only 5 Turkish actors to chose from?
Do "Brazilian Cinderela" It´s a trash-classic from Brazil, and without the tramps...
Awww. I miss Ed Glazer.
He's that one guy I saw, forgot about, then saw in someone else's video and forever regretted not checking further on, forgot again, then saw again.
And the cycle repeats.
Watch Ninja: The Mission Force if you haven't already.
Looking at that cliff jump, I'd say this is more Turkish Assassin's Creed...
Turkish First Blood can't be any worse than Rambo II, III or the recent video game.
You missed a good opportunity to make a Futurama reference by joking about how the video company's name sounds alot like the character Calculon from All My Circuits.
Also is this as good as Turkish Robocop where it's 90 minutes of people wandering around a desert and trying to double a small Turkish town for Detroit? And the Peter Weller stand in, is an older Turkish actor that uses trash cans as his cyborg suit? And the movie is also a cross over of Turkish Beverly Hills Cop and Turkish Top Gun?
No! It means you get
Your yellow ticket-of-leave
You are a thief.
I stole a loaf of bread.
You robbed a house.
I broke a window pane.
My sisters child was close to death
And we were starving.
I still would really like to send brad a copy of turkish the shining, its wicked!
Good news, Mr. Snob, there are still other Turkish remakes you can review. Such as Turkish Godfather, Turkish Straw Dogs, Turkish Bonnie and Clyde and everyone's favorite, Turkish Rocky. ENJOY!
Turkish Wonder Woman, Brad? Surely you meant Turkish Elektra (which I have no trouble suggesting is still a worse movie than this one is).
Children shouldn't play with dead Things(1972)?
This is incredible. But god... I love the 1970's.
Also, it's good to be the King.
God damn, these Turkish girls. This one isn't as hauntingly beautiful as the girl from Turkish I Spit on Your Grave, but she's still wife material.
Expendables 4 needs to have Cuneyt Arkin in it. And he NEEDS to get into a fist-fight with Chuck Norris, which ends with them giving each other a thumbs up and then fighting an army of vampire ninjas.
I've seen clips of that new RAMBO video game, Brad, and it looks pretty cool. Especially the scenes that take place in Afghanistan. It certainly looks better than the shitty NES game from 1986!
DAMN YOU, BRAD! I NOW KNOW WHAT NUGGET PORN IS!
I CAN'T UNKNOW THAT! DAMN YOU!
Some of the older archived videos of 2009 were brought over from the youtube account before thecinemasnob.com was created, so please forgive the lesser video quality of such as some did not transfer well.