This is longer than I Spit On Your Grave. Are all anniversary videos going to get longer and longer? Will we get a five parter for the 400th Video?
Heaven's Gate is a 3 1/2 hour movie. I Spit on Your Grave isn't.
It's a good thing you're not watching the re-edited version, since that's now characterized as "one of the greatest injustices of cinematic history."
I wish I was joking.
Does the DVD copy you own have the movie all on one disc, or is it split up across two?
Originally, Cimino cut the film to run at almost five hours long, but United Artists demanded he cut an hour and a half off to increase showtimes at theatres.
Only 3,5? It's over 5 hours long according to IMDB...
I sure hope so! Perhaps the European cut of "Once Upon a Time in America" for a future milestone episode?!
I doubt he'll do the European cut, "Once Upon a Time in America" isn't boring or bad enough.
The 5-part review should be on Bernardo Bertolucci's "1900", the 5-hour long movie that can't decide whether it is an English language movie or an Italian language movie!
Too critically acclaimed. Heaven's Gate, Caligula and say Salo generated bad publicity, sparked controversy and continue to dived opinion. 1900 is widely seen as a masterpiece, Sure it's long, but so is Fanny and Alexander or Berlin Alexanderplatz.
Nah. Next anniversary he should do The Movie Orgy (a.k.a. Cheeseburger Film Sandwich). Fucking 420 minutes long. =P Unfortunately however I don't believe it currently exists on video in any format. Gotta wait for Joe Dante to do another screening of it somewhere.
How about Andy Warhol's "Empire"? An 8 hour long shot of the Empire State Building!
So, having sex at a picnic is like, a popular pastime in merry yea olde England? With vegetables. I don't want to get side tracked - obviously this is Brad's moment - but, wow, I gotta visit England more often. 😉
Haha Snob you make the best videos man, keep em coming!
It was very telling that Christopher Walken refused to be part of the documentary Final Cut: The Unmaking of Heaven's Gate. (A doc where everyone who mattered in this movie except for Cimino and Walken sat around and praised this turd for 90 minutes.)
Also, I am convinced that Cimino fought to the death to cast Isabelle Huppert because he not so secretly wanted her on the casting couch.
I'm not so certain about the casting couch idea! I think he couldn't get his first choice and then went down the list. From what I gather Huppert was the great European sensation of the time and the battle was more about Cimino having final say. The more disapproving the studio was, the more he dug in. Also, I'm not so certain that Cimino was much of a ladies man, if you acquire my drift.
Big fan, love the reviews... but why the censorship on nudity? I get it for youtube etc, but this is your own site??? If it was anyone else I guess I would chalk it up to good ole' American puritanism... though somehow I doubt that's the reason.
What separates Heaven's Gate from the films by Terrence Malick? Both this movie and Malick's movies are beautifully shot sure, but when Malick does it, you call it a bunch of pretentious crap, but yet Heaven's Gate is good, for some reason.
I'm not a Terrence Malick fan = I now have to dislike every pretentious movie ever.
Plus, Malick's movies (lately) have no story. HEAVEN'S GATE has a narrative and characters. It just reallllllly takes its time
It's ok Brad. I'm a Terrence Malick fan (well... "Tree of Life" I'm still on the fence about and have yet to see "to the wonder") and I personally love the jokes you make about him on your show. The do make me laugh a lot. Keep it up. As far as Heaven's Gate is concerned, it looks great but man it is also dull in all the other areas. The story is un-involving and I don't care about anyone in it and it is therefore very boring to me. I have seen it three times hoping my view would change but alas no. But that's just me. I'm not one that gives in to hyperbole surrounding the films failure (at least not anymore). it's not a total disaster. It is worth seeing at least once. Thanks for covering it on your show. Also read the book by steven bach
Perhaps this is just *MY* opinion, which is really the *ONLY opinion that matters, save for The Master Himself, The Cinema Snob, but in *MY* viewing of Heaven's Gate I detected an air of being ironic that was DECADES ahead of it's time. I don't detect that sort of feeling from The Great Terrence Malick.
Christ, Film Brain sure turned into Jeffrey Dahmer since "Bitch-Tits".
Oh well, at least I likely have "Thundercunt" to look forward to by the end of the year video!
Such a great honor! Awesome review.
Hola, Yayo. Qué bonito te salió:).
Hahaha amazing! such an honor watching a Mexican here, congrats :)
No mames yayo, que culero hablas el ingles... hasta jacobowong lo habla mejor. Y lo que mas me caga son los youtubers mexicanos que "se les salen" palabras en ingles y a la hora se realmentr hablarlo, lo hablan para la puta madre con un super acento. Ni siquiera decente. Ya me bloqueaste en Instagram, anda bloqueame en YouTubE tambien por ser tu mas grande troll. Pero anda, SIGUEME Y TE SIGO!
Calm down You sucker
nice callback with your Prokofiev Romeo and Juliet rington to ur Caligula ep :)
Quick question Brad: do you use Final Cut or Premier Pro for your editing? I think I'm correct in assuming you don't use Moviemaker.
Best cameo ever.
I am, of course, talking about the American Sniper desktop wallpaper.
I'm sure we'll eventually see Neal (Spoony) in the third part, but the Fat Grandma and Walken cameos are the best parts of this video!
Dude, you have to be smoking something really great. Please refer me to your dealer forthwith. Fat Grandma is the stupidist, most unfunny character ever devised in comedic history. The so called Walken cameo was OK, not great. But are you telling me that the Cinema Snob, an internet phenomenon who has been around for 300 plus episodes and has more credibility with many fans than the "legit" reviewers, can't get the REAL Chris Walken to do a short cameo? I mean, the guy does cameos in some buttfucking awful movies. He couldn't do one here?
Fat Grandma is the greatest character OF ALL TIME.
You want some cheese with that whine?
True. But I think Linkara is boring too. Tbh, The Cinema Snob is the only genius.
I like your way of communicating.
Good continuation! Again, congrats on your 300th Brad! Never stop being awesome bro! :-)
Alright am I the only one getting advertisements for Wyoming before these videos? Both Heavens Gate videos, no kidding. I find that hilariously weird.
Also this review has, so far, been one of the best. It's rare that there is one of a film I've actually seen, so it's even more exciting for that. It's also rare that a Criterion Collection selected movie lets me down. I'm glad I sat through it, but don't figure I will again.
I've been getting Wyoming ads for over a month.
I actually clicked one last week, and ordered a free Wyoming tourist guide. I've always been kind of interested in the state, so hey, why not? It's free to get the guide. I can't wait for that baby to show up here....
Sigh. Who am I kidding? I'll never go to Wyoming, or anywhere worth visiting.
You really should go to Wyoming. It's a beautiful state and there are interesting places in every corner of it. One of my favorite vacation destinations.
I've been getting ads for Wyoming for quite some time (narrated by Robert Duvall?), but I assumed that was due to having a friend-of-the-family FROM Wyoming staying with us for a time awhile back and a backlash of sorts from her own internet browsing. XÞ
I used to know a chick on the internet who came from Portugal, but went to college in Wyoming.
I asked her a few times why the hell she chose Wyoming when moving to the states, but never got a straight answer.
Yep, I've been getting these on a lot of videos, but it's funny to see them on this one. And someday I'll visit Wyoming. Going to every state is on my bucket list.
i thought you were gonna start with greatest american hero again.... now i'm sad lol
I wholeheartedly agree!
I like that you're dividing the review of this thing over 3 videos, as it accentuates the fact that this movie is a slog to watch.
Dude, I love ya but this episode sucked. First, your persona is still Brad. You established it in the earliest episodes. You're not Craig, you don't even work as a Craig. Just abandon it quietly and everyone will forget you keep trying to establish TCS as "Craig". Next, Linkara isn't funny. He's not funny as himself. He's REALLY not funny as "Fat Grandma". The scenes with him/her in it are dead air. One could make the argument that this makes a point about a movie where there is a lot of dead air, but I doubt Linkara would approve of that assessment. No one who isn't a comic book nerd even watches Linkara's videos. I'm a huge fan of Channel Awesome and he's one of the only ones I can't stand. Lastly, who the hell is the French dude with the OBVIOUS mascara and eye shadow?
Indeed, every video past this point should be tailored solely to you and nobody else. That's how the world works.
One could start a discussion here about "universal" versus "niche". Of course there are no absolutes in comedy, but you could make a solid argument that a movie like "Airplane!" is more universally funny, whereas "Madea Goes to Jail" is more of a niche comedy. This goes to the heart of my statement about Linkara, which I take it is what you are referencing. I have no doubt that Linkara is side splittingly hilarious to a small portion of the Channel Awesome audience. Brad is more of a universally funny comedian. Anyone over the age of 20 who watches movies will get most of his references, indeed, that's what makes him an awesome comedian. But a lengthy "Fat Grandma" segment just alienates that same audience. It doesn't reference any particular film, it doesn't contain any really clever jokes. I suppose I could see two ways you could find "Fat Grandma" funny: 1) You had to go tou your own boring grandma's house a lot as a kid and this reminds you of it, or 2) this is, in fact, a sendup of the Tyler Perry Madea movies. If it's the second, I confess I haven't seen them and I'm not going to.
My god are you pretentious.
You mean Craig and Brad are the same person! That's worse than finding out Santa was really just my dad.
"Fat Grandma has powers you wouldn't even dream of, boy."
It's one thing to not find a segment funny, it's another to bitch about it like a spoiled brat.
Yeah. They suck. But they got a fanbase I guess, so....?
I fucking hate film brainfart.
Always nice to hear Josh pop up, no pun intended. And I'm down with a Snob three parter. Hell I could go for a month on Strike Commando or Robowar alone.
Wasn't that an action cartoon from the 80's?
Almost, it wad plural.
The fact that Josh Hadley voices a dick is the definition of inspired casting
It was more inspired when he voiced an asshole
"Big Box" voice Vick is his dick, Haddley is his asshole :0
It's called type casting.
Brad, did you hear Pepsi dropped a hint this weak that Crystal Pepsi is coming back?
Pepsi spokesperson Angela Tucciarone told NBC News, "We take customer feedback very seriously and we do think Crystal Pepsi fans will be happy with what we have planned."
It even got a mention on Garbage Time with Katie Nolan on Fox Sports 1.
Fuck me, Huppert is like a Renaissance painting. I almost would have been too reverent of that kind of beauty to fuck her silly.
The cameos were cancer, especially Linkara. Especially now that everyone knows what a bizarre, shitty person he is. The French guy* in the lady's shirt was trying I think. Not that I don't understand that you have to do your part in TGWTG, it's just that I want to see you shed some light on this piece of cinematic history, not do forced comedy with a balding, drunk Englishman who has literally always sucked at everything, let alone fucking Linkara.
*I don't care if he's not actually a Frog and Belgians are pretty much Frogs anyway so don't pull that
When you have something actually enlightening to say, just let me know, because third was the most pointless comment ever known to man. See you on the flip side, Faggot Josh!
What the hell is your problem? How is Linkara a shitty person? Brad asks his friends to be in his videos because they're his friends, and he enjoys their input. No one's asking them to be YOUR friends. HE'S HAVING FUN. Christ, you're like an overbearing mother.
To quote Nash Bozard, you're saying words, but all I hear is crazy.
Yes, because as we all know, the large majority of Belgians actually speaking Dutch and having close cultural ties with the Netherlands means they are basically Frogs. It's one and the same, true story.
Of course the most coke-infused persona on the internet casts a guy named Yayo as his producer.
You know what would be a killer memorial movie? When William Shatner dies, you should honor his long and storied career with a look at the classic esperanto horror film Incubus in which he starred.
I thought your penis had the voice/was Vic from the big box videos?
I'm loving this review! I always like to see Fat Grandma and Bastard Film Brain!
Bastard Film Brain is the best
I've never been a big fan of his cameos in the past, but he really hit it out of the park on this one. Fantastic read.
is...is rob walker dipping gummy candies in nutella? because i really want to try that now.
Actually that was Doug Walker doing the dipping. Rob provided the voice. Great impression btw.
Funny as always Brad, especially the cameos. How come Walken didn't have pictures of country bears surrounding him? Will we see a Driller Killer spoof of you eating a box of pizza in Part 3? I feel that's the equivalent of these long scenes.
I'm just wondering, is your 400th episode gonna be A Clockwork Orange?
Oh, I would LOVE that
i can seem to understand what that weird sounding person is saying.
Doing this Craig shit agin?
This movie would have been so much better if they had had a flamethrowing guitar rather than a violin!
Loved that Red Dead Redemption reference you put in there.
God dammit, Fat Grandma - why can't I stop laughing at you???
Kudos on your stamina, Mr. Snob!
Well I have to say, I didn't think I'd ever hear a reference to Brian's Gothic Symphony in one of your videos. It might be a good analog to this movie if Heaven's Gate is also exhausting to sit through.
Josh Hadley as Talking Penis.
Best. Credit. Ever!
- Caligula Ringtone? Nice. The speaker on that phone is impressive. ;-)
- I love that "the Walken" continues to talk even though he's eating a gummy bear at the same time. Such is the power of Walken.
- "The White-Tailed Buck"? That's just every single sort of creepy. Keep it up. :-D
congrats, mr. snob! May your sexual powers arousal you over the next 300 : )
Does this mean we will get a Dogs of war review soon?
Good video! And nice to see you Yayo :)
Yayo!! He´s mexican, not french :v
His youtube channel:
Yayo es el mejor, me pregunto como es que llegaron a trabajar juntos.
Wow! Yayo :)
19:02- I'm surprised you didn't mention the part in Gigli where Christopher Walken was in the mood for some pie. "Put some on your head!"
Who does Cimino think he is, Stanley Kubrick? I wish I could go back in time and become a movie producer just so I can give Cimino even more shit for making this movie than he already got.
So you'd be an asshole to him then. That's nice. It's nice you are a asshole.
He's an asshole! He's the one who wants to burn through huge amounts of the studio's money just so he can pretend like he can make Gone With The Wind combined with The Godfather!
so, i was just watching the snob's Brazilian star wars review, and it just occurred to me, there is a little series that i remember from my childhood that was in fact a cancelled TV show of sorts with only about 6 exceptionally long episodes, looking back at it it was basically horrible McDonalds advertising, its called "the wacky adventures of Ronald McDonald, and i would like to see it show show up on DVD-R hell, i think its perfect material for DVD-R hell.
Obscurus Lupa did a Radu Reviews video on one of those, Visitors From Outer Space.
I mean, that's not a DVD-R Hell, but it's only one degree of separation.
Great video! But man that Christopher Walken impression was ban, starting to feel better about mine
OMG! Yayo. ¿Do you speak english? It's a surprise. ¡!
hahah so yayo just make come here! i think he looks real nervous! :D
Well, at least I'm not the only one who set his ring tone to Dance of the Knights
okay, this episode sucks. I like the dialogue and riffing while the movie is playing and the josh hadley dick stuff. Hilarious. But holy shit the "steve" producer guy, whoever he is, not funny in the least. Actually so poorly edited and unfunny (the steve segments that is) I had to stop watching. Love you Brad but damn this one sucked. Not bad enough to stop watching future episodes just give some Josh style opinions. please keep up the videos you are still my favorite.
I like how I am getting commercials for Wyoming during the breaks while watching each part.
Josh Hadley as himself
Looks like Linkara's transition is going fairly well.
Some of the older archived videos of 2009 were brought over from the youtube account before thecinemasnob.com was created, so please forgive the lesser video quality of such as some did not transfer well.